Fast Cars and Slow Sex: Why slow sex?

Okay now we're at the day the LORD has made let us rejoice and be glad in it!

SEX, LIES, VIDEOTAPE

The lesson isn't in SLOW SEX..but why is it SEX?

See, I am a minister of the Gospel. (Remember?)
I am one that is always going to tell you what the word says.

When I started this three day series (today is the 3rd day), I shared with you that the lesson was in the title.

SEX...is not what it should be call between A MARRIED MAN AND A WOMAN.

YOU BETTER MAKE LOVE AND MAKE IT FAST OR SLOW.
Your house, your bed, your marriage, is YOUR BUSINESS, but it's not sex. When you become intimate with your husband you are sharing something SPIRITUAL with this man you love. You are exchanging touches, kisses, bodily fluids (be real, not a prude), and you are looking into the eyes of your husband and LOVING ON HIM.
It's LOVE. There is no if ands or buts about it.

What does this have to do with priorties?
If you go to bed with the intent of just having SEX, you already have a planned attack on your spouse and your marriage. Your proiorty is to get it done; slow or not.

Making love is slow. Sex is fast and unemtional.

Fast Cars and Slow sex......change your priorties and LIVE.

Dana Williamson
www.baddanamarie.com

Ways to be B.A.D #22: You are a King

Ladies, I know this is our BLOG, but it's time you be the help me to your husband.

NO, I DIDN'T' SAY YOU'RE MAN. I said you HUSBAND.

He is the one that is king of the castle; God made him the head. HE is the one that needs you to see GOD IN HIM. If you don't SEE GOD, that doesnt' mean get a divorce. That means pray for him so that HE SEES GOD IN YOU. Never under estimate your praying power.

Your tongue talks to your mama more than it speaks to GOD about your marriage. That is not treating your husband like a king, that is treating HIM LIKE A CHILD. Get on your knees and pray for his well being.

Cook
Clean
Work/do business
Encourage
Motivate
Speak highly of
Help him....

HE IS YOUR KING...so QUIT PLAYING

Motherly Wisdom #23: The wife is submissive to the husband

Very short and to the point: WIVES YOU SUBMIT TO YOUR HUSBAND ONLY. This is the husband that God sent, because your hubby is submitting and obeying GOD. This the husband that cleaves to you and leaves his parents. THIS IS THE HUSBAND THAT PUTS YOU SECOND TO GOD..not anyone else.

You don't submit to your parents, or HIS; you don't' put the KIDS FIRST or anyone else. 

Yes, you better stay on your knees, in prayer,  for your husband because you don't have time to play with God. Stay on your knees for your husband, because he needs you in the background to help him press through the front. Stay on your knees for your husband, because he is the head.

Your husband is the one God sent to take care of home, build you up and support you. Don't disrespect your husband or you'll be disrespecting God.


Dana Neal
Coach and Mama!

the lock on the door

I took about 3-4 months creating a poetry book that would be strictly for the married. The poems were a part of me and where I wanted things to BE in my marriage. I so believe that marriage takes work and you have to work it (ladies and gentlemen) to keep the flame alive.

Some of these poems really touch the inside of your intimate places. My married freiends...don't get shy now! Get the poetry book; take a day off, get a hotel room with your spouse....and let the emotions..flow...

the lock on the door

This collection of intimate poems helps bring the mind's eye back to the first kiss, the I-do, and the first love. Re-igniting the senses to help rekindle the flame.

Don Savant~~Real Love Book Review

"Real Love"

.....you are the…future bearer of my last name…
the…
future garden…
playing host to my seed…
which i intend to plant
ever so graciously…
with a halo of love surrounding us as you nurture…
and our sons and daughters
grow inside of you…
to be presented to this world…
under the wings of you and i…
committed…
forever remaining in tact…
for both their sake…
ours…
and those who wish to have
what we display
every hour…
of each
and every day…..

Link to book.

http://alturl.com/bexk

Don Savant~~
WWW.LuLu.com/DonSavant

Join The Writer's Block Today....
http://donsavant.14.forumer.com

The Writer's Block Logo by PNER -aka- JamaicanfireS. Contact her for your graphics needs. JamaicanfireS@aol.

Emotional Adultery...??

I learned something today on the program Love Worth Finding with Dr. Adrian Rogers, God rest his soul. Something about adultery, I do not think I knew.
There are various forms of adultery that we are familiar with in the bible..one of which is physical, the other is mental...but the emotional form of adultery I just learned today. Emotional...

As Dr. Rogers explained it, emotional is when you take what is in the home and share it with someone of the opposite sex. You are basically telling your business to some other party that has an interest in you(you being the man or the woman). I thought to myself "now, that isn't altogether true"...but he went further to explain, what is so simple as sharing your "heart" with someone who understands you can turn into physical adultery. You can do your best to stop it, but then, the flesh jumps in. Now does that have something to do with how spiritually rooted you are or are not? I would think so. You see, I would share my good times and bad times with family and friends. But then I heard a Prophetess Juanita Bynum say not to share your marital information with people, especially women. (being a woman; I never shared with a man, except my dad) She said you just don't take it there, because they can use it against you and take your man or ruin your marriage to their advantage.

Oh yes, Lord..now I"m listening! Duh! Slap on the forehead for me.

There are some things you keep between your spouse and yourself so that it cannot be played on in your emotions. No one knows either of you BETTER than the two that are married together. No one can make you who you are NOT, by the words of someone else. PERIOD. Why one loves the other, or why the other does what they do is a connection that happens between the two married people.

Emotional adultery was very new to me, but I understand the implications on a marriage that it has. I can take this, as Dr. Rogers said, compare it to the bible and find some comparison. The only way to stop adultery, in any form, in its tracks is to recognize that it has been done..and ask for forgiveness and move on. Does not mean you get a pass go free card, but it does mean you can try to start over from that point.

The one thing, these last days, about adultery, is the victim has to decide where do they go from here. Is it worth the starting over or just dealing with life single? Do you move forward under God's grace and try not to backslide? What do you do?

I know the bible gives us good reason to divorce because of adultery, but even then, if the Lord can heal all wounds, and forgive all past mishaps, why shouldn't the spouse? As a saved-married woman, I can say that God forgives and gives people numerous chances to get right. Marriage is not a game; but love makes choices and takes chances. Whether emotional or physical adultery is present or has been present, you have to look to the Lord for your passport to leave.

God bless...

Marriage Monday--Staying in Love

There are times when your marriage is going to feel like it is just plain over. When you get to that point, you are going to wonder what have you been trying for and what are your reasons to KEEP trying.

YOu have to know that no matter how weak you get in the middle of the storm, you have to stand strong and weather it. You can not let the devil win and you cannot keep letting him in.

You are a the successor of your marriage, whether you are the wife or the husband. God will get all the glory in yor marriage if you continue, to try, to stay in love. It's not about your feelings or your mind, or what you can get as an indivdual, it's about the love you give to the other person. It's about what their feelings are and what can happen in regards to building that love. It is about taking YOU out of the equation.

Taking you out of the equation is going to cause you pain...but those that endure for the goodness of the Lord...well you can figure out the rest! Amen?? Prayer and supplication are the key elements to staying in love and keeping the love alive. I don't want to put pressure on your mind at this time, but you have to know that nothing in life is better than staying in love.

God bless.

Marriage Monday~~You Chose to Get Married, Now Stay Married

This is just a brief statement I wanted to share since I have been on vacation for the past week.

Ladies and gentlemen, if you chose to get married (without the Lord's leading) and are going through various trials and tribulations, you have to decide to STAY married. What I mean is, you might have fallen down and did things the world's way, and now are suffering from the devil's snares, but you have to make a decision to do what's right. You're married under the eyes of the Lord. Decide to do the biblical thing and leave your marriage in his hands.

I have told people, it's not a marriage without some trials. I learned this from Juanita Bynum;a CD she has about the Proverbs 31 woman...you are going to have to go through some things. Especially being a Christian; you will go through a lot of things.

I am not one to say my marriage is perfect, but I am one to say I will fight the good fight despite what the world thinks. As Christians, you have to look at the love you originally had and bring it back into the marriage. You might have to understand that it is going to take time, but time is all you have (long or short). God is looking to you both (if you are saved) to do the right thing according to his word. If only one of you is saved, get 'ta prayin'! Someone has to keep the strength in the marriage, especially if you want it all to work.

There are going to be times where each of you are going to have to take YOU out of the equation and pull it all together. We are in our last days and the last thing you want to hinder you from making it to heaven is not being who you need to be in your marriage.

Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord. Fro the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. Eph. 5:22-23

Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ Loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word,
Eph 5: 25-27

God is good and will "see" you through all things in your life. Look to him to help you rekindle the spice in your life.
God bless.

Marriage Monday ----It takes two, but which two?

Welcome to Marriage Monday! Today's topic is neither good nor bad,but very thought provoking.

It takes two to make a marriage work. Today, we're talking about which two; actually, which two does it start WITH. (Follow me, it may take some time)

1. When you are a Christian married couple, both believing completely in the Lord, it's going to take you to realize what you need to do to make it. Together, you are going to have to pray and submit yourselves to God. You are going to have to repent for whatever you might have done wrong to your spouse. You are going to have to get into your prayer closets and listen to the spirit as it tells you WHAT YOU DID WRONG. When both spouses are saved and filled with the Holy Spirit, the world can't tell you what to do, only the spirit can..and following God's word....

2. When only one spouse is saved and filled with the Holy Spirit, you still have to go in prayer and listen to the Lord. Wives have a problem with starting off in prayer (honestly, I do)..and we always end up in prayer when everything has hit the fan and the divorce papers are being printed. Ladies and gentlemen, prayer is the only way out........direction from the bible is the only way IN....It's going to take the one saved spouse and the Lord to get this marriage back on track. And again, you are going to have to listen and know what to do next.

It's all about being on the right track. The enemy is going to come and attack you with all that he can when he knows you are trying to do what is right according to the word. AND you will have to be ready...whatever is important to you and your salvation the enemy will come in and try to tear it down..you have to know what to do next and start now! Don't let your marriage become a stomping ground for the devil and his army of misfits. Build your marriage up with praise, thanksgiving and worship! And Allow the Lord to move..it takes two...and make sure the Lord is one of those TWO!

Marriage Monday-----Calgon, take me away

I am so frustrated with what is going on in the Christian community for our marriages. Wives don't' have enough calgon time.

We need a break away from the nonsense..the drama, the lack of love and intimate response. WE as wives need too. There is so much we can and cannot deal with, even as Christians. It's hard to pray for a husband that you no longer like. It's hard to pray for God to help us, when in our hearts, we aren't sure we want to be helped.

So, we need calgon! We need something to take us away from this spiritually illogical world we live in and give us some peace of mind. I have heard people stress and stress and I have seen families help to tear them down. OH my heavenly father! Wives need something to take them away from this mess and just hear. Marriage is hard, whether you are Christian or not. It's not fun for the wife to do all the work.

With that, what is your answer? What do you think? When you choose to love...love as the bible tells you..why does it seem to be so frustrating? Is it the devil attacking?

I'd like to keep this topic going for next week............if you will lend a hand and talk back!

Affair Proof Your Marriage

On a marriage cruise a few years back, we had the pleasure of meeting George and Cassie Soete, who were willing to be vulnerable enough to share their story to urge families to affair-proof their marriages.

Roll back the clock 23 years to their 20th wedding anniversary. This is the day George announced to his wife and children that he was leaving them. He was rejecting his wife to pursue the wife of a friend of his. For years before that, unbeknownst to them, they had a third party in their marriage. His name was Satan. The father of lies was teaching this couple, married young and the parents of six, that it is okay to pursue life as each saw fit. Cassie, busy with six children admittedly did not think about pursuing her relationship with her husband. With six kids and twenty years of history, she just assumed he would always be there. George, with a promising business of his own decided his life was ready for some changes, and the biggest obstacle he could see to those changes was his wife.

That evening was not the end of the turmoil. For the next 4.5 years, George moved in and out of the family home at least 8 times, each time saying it was the last move in, then the last move out. With children in five different schools, and toddlers still to potty train, Cassie was devastated. She felt conquered and destroyed. George was playing at life, much like a hamster in a plastic running ball. He thought he was free, but he was really in a bondage he could not recognize. He thought he was having the time of his life, but he was really in a bubble hitting the baseboard, with no more hope than a rodent of ever pulling out of there.

Finally, blessedly, Cassie began to seek another man in her own life, the Lord. A friend invited her to a Bible believing church and she heard the marriage series Bob Russell was doing years ago. She was coming to the realization that she could not change her husband, but she could do one thing. She could spend her idle time and her loneliness to draw closer to God, through the study of his word and through prayer. George began to see a different person in his wife. His wife was the victim, being continually trashed and discarded, but she had the peace he so desperately wanted. He plucked a tape off her counter entitled, “Conflict in Marriage.” He took it back with him and listened, and through Bob’s message, the Holy Spirit went to work in his life, convicting him of his sin and his need for a savior. “I knew I was purely and absolutely wrong on the eyes of the Lord.” He also knew he needed to pursue the bride of his youth. “The loser in this thing is me” he thought. He wanted to come home, and for the first time, Cassie said, “No.”

Cassie needed some things. She wanted assurance that her husband really had transformed. He had. She needed to know he would never leave her again. He has not. She needed to be able to trust him. After quite a bit of time went by, he did regain her trust. She needed to know she was cherished and loved absolutely and positively by her husband. She is. They rebuilt their marriage, with much work from the entire family. Things were awkward at first, but now they are more vibrant, more satisfied, and more in love than they ever believed possible, even as they took their vows 39 years ago. Once they survived the horror of a marriage ripped apart by Satan’s lies, other couples going through similar crisis sought them. People wanted to know how they did it. They wanted the magic formula. This eventually lead to the Marriage Mentoring program at their church that now helps numerous couples survive with their marriages intact. The Soetes know no magic formulas, but they have many suggestions to share with other couples. “Do not try to change your spouse. Concentrate on what changes you need in yourself, primarily in your relationship with the Lord, and secondarily in your role as a spouse. Love in complete obedience to your Lord,. It is not about obtaining happiness. It is about obedience, then true happiness can be obtained.” The Soetes also urged women to be extremely vigilant in the marriage. If you suspect something is amiss, address it head on. Do not shove it under the carpet and hope it will go away. That is a lie of Satan, who wants to destroy your marriage. As Cassie quipped,” You can lead a horse to water, but you can’t make him drink, but it does not hurt to salt the oats.”

Ask yourself if YOU would want to be married to YOU? Are you living in such a way that anyone would be attracted to you? Are you the kind of person God desires you to be? If not, change. Use God’s word to transform yourself, surround yourself with God’s truth and reject the worldly methods you may have tried before. They simply do not work. Set appropriate boundaries to protect your marriage. Keep yourself accountable and fresh in the Word.

Some books the couple suggested were: Love Life by Ed Wheat, Sacred Marriage by Gary Thomas, Every Woman’s Desire by Stephen Arterburn and Fred Stoeker, and the Bible.

Finally, George Soete stated he had to put a stake in the ground and declare that regardless of the past, regardless of the world’s influence, he was declaring that the lie of divorce is STOPPING here. This is not a legacy he wants to spread further down his family tree. He insists there needs to be a defining moment when you make that declaration, and never remove the stake.


About the Author
Malia Russell is the blessed wife to Duncan, thankful mother to four children, ages 3-17 and an author, conference speaker and director of www.homemaking911.com. Visit her site for inspiration, encouragement and practical help in your roles as a godly wife, mother, homemaker or home educator.


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Thinking Thursday~~Being IN Love Again

(click the title to either sponsor or be apart of an event for married couples only)

Sometimes when you have been married for so long,you forget how to be IN love. The bible tells us to love one another regardless of everything. All the faults, all the wrongs, all the everything!

Some verses I want to share with you are from the Lord. Guiding us in loving.

1 John 3:11-24
This is the message you heard from the beginning: We should love one another. Do not be like Cain, who belinged to the evil on and murdered his brother. And why did he murder him? Because his own actions were evil and his brother's were righteous. Do not be surprised, my brothers, if the world hates you. We know that we have passed from death to life, because we love our brothers. Anyone who hates his brother is a msurderer, and you know that no murderer has eternal life in him.
This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us. And we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers. If anyone has material possessions and sees his brother in need but has no pity on him, how can the love of God be in him? Dear children, let us not love with words or tongue but with actions and in truth. This then is how we know that we belong to the truth, and how we set our hearts at rest in his presence henever our hearts condemn us. For God is greater than our hearrts, and he knows everything. Dear friends, if our hearts do not condemn us, we have confidence before God and receive frm him antyhing we ask, because we obey his commands and do wath pleases him. And this is his command; to believe in the name of his Son, jesus Christ, and to love one another as he commanded us. Those who obey his commands live in him, and he in them. And this is how we know that he lives in us: We know it by the Spirit he gave us.

Song of Songs (solomn)
3:1
All night long on my bed I looked for the one my heart loves; I looked for him but did not find him.

I believe most women want to be IN love again with their husbands. Sometimes the struggles in life and and in love bring an emotional down fall and we don't know what to do.
I believe that most husbands were taught to take care of the physical, material issues in the home and that everything else would be secondary. I believe that most men, were taught that emotions didn't matter.
After so many years, each one are trying to fall in love again and not look at what happened in the past.
How do you get there? Where do you start? First, start with what love is and how it should be handled in the marriage. Second, start with what love isn't and how respectful each spouse should be to the other.
Although we choose to love, it is something we HAVE TO CHOOSE TO DO. In 1st John we are shown that if we don't love, God isn't in us.
I want to walk with the God in me instead of not. My salvation is important.
In a marriage the salvation of both are important. The light shines from the husband and wife and the kids see it. Our love to each other is helping whomever is watching us (mainly, our children, then our famiy, then our friends)

If you don't feel IN love. Fall in love again with your spouse by creating an atmosphere pleasurable to your mate.
1. Read your bible and smile with the glory of God in your heart and your mind!
2. Love your husband/wife despite the things you don't like about them
3. Respect each other
4. Read the song of songs(solomn) to each other
5. Ask God to place a new heart in you for your spouse
6. Thank them for being them
7. If you need counseling...get it!
8. Go on a retreat/conference just for married persons.

God bless you in all that you do for your marriage and your family.

Blessing your husband!!!

Ladies, let me say something about being sexy. You are only as beautiful as you think you are. Gentlemen, love your wives as you love yourself. Now you know that we need you to say the right thing. Not what we want to hear~~that's not biblical or wise. Ladies we have to learn that. Because those black pants from two years ago that now look grey...you husband told a story...they are not cute!!

But, but, when you slip off those grey/black pants to give to goodwill or the salvation army, take them off for your husband! Be intimate with him. Changing those tight grey pants from a chore to tearing off wrapping paper to a beautiful thing. You!

Bless your husband with your presence. Give him your essence...let him see you all over again, and if he loves you the weight won't matter.

*check out http://www.ckqgifts.biz for risque for the married.